Who am I?
I have no idea. (But if you're going to read this particular page at all, then please read to the end.)
Sure, there are a lot of preconceived notions about me out there. For instance, when I was in high school everyone was convinced that I was going to blow the place up and kill everybody. No wonder I've never had a girlfriend, after encounters like this:
FRIGHTENED GIRL: "Is your name Will Matheson?"
ME: "Uh... yeah, last time I checked."
FRIGHTENED GIRL: "Do you have a website?"
ME: "Yeah... h t t p colon forward-slash forward-slash s u r f dot
t o slash will."
FRIGHTENED GIRL: "Is it true that you have the names of all the people
that you're going to kill on there?"
Now, in all fairness, stupid exchanges like this occurred mostly in the days after the Columbine shootings. With all due respect to the people affected by the tragedy, let me say this: Those two fruitcakes (the school shooters) did nothing to decrease the suffering of their compatriots in other schools. In fact, by doing what they did, they orchestrated a wave of paranoia and oppression throughout the world (which became evident to me soon afterwards when I was nearly arrested - I blame the ignorant administration for volunteering my name when they knew full well I didn't have anything to do with anything - and I certainly didn't have 30 names on my website of people I was going to kill!). My suggestion to people who really do contemplate such violence - if you don't like school, try dropping out. This works for government and religion too - the trick is to stop paying attention.
But anyway, back to who I am. Frankly, I think I'm a perfectly normal, healthy person. I haven't taken Methylphenidate for years, and I've stopped visiting the high school because it's not a pleasant experience to be picked on by people who have never even seen me before.
University, on the other hand, is an utter joy. I go to Saint Mary's, and while I can't say that I've fallen in love with the place, at least it's blessedly civil compared to high school. I've been made fun of maybe twice. It's wonderful. And women even talk to me sometimes, reassuring me that my life can only get better after high school.
But I still haven't answered the question of who I am, have I? Let's ask Joe and see what he thinks.
JOE: "Oh, gee... I dunno. You're pretty indefinable."
Okay, so much for Joe, but thanks anyway. =) Maybe a bio would be nice, even though it was made up for a play.
FACTS:
Name: William George Ross Matheson
Age: 19
Date of birth: 01-31-1982
Status: Single, and sort-of looking but not desperately.
Interests: Creative writing, music.
Occupation: Student at Saint Mary's University
Political Achievements: Few.
Psycho: No.
Geek: No.
Freak: No.
Crazy: Maybe a little...